I remember I used to firmly against it, saying that people always had a chance in the end, and that even people that go out and rape little girls and kill people or whatever, that they should stay in prison forever and that maybe they could become saved one day. Hey I guess if it happened to Jeffrey Dahmer it could happen to anybody, right? But now I'm not so sure.
Anyways so I had this odd dream, and please don't judge me by it's radical content. It was a dream and has no reflection of my life, it was just a dream, remember that.
So I was in this big house, and I had become friends with this little boy and this little girl, the boy was about 8 or so, and the girl was around twelve or thirteen. We hung out throughout the dream, and eventually, I guess towards the morning, I'm thinking, I saw them, and we were suddenly running from their parents. Dreams don't really make sense, if you know by now, but somehow I knew that we were running from them in this massive house, even though we could not see them. We kept running away from them and I felt as I were the girl in the dream for some reason, yet I still had my own body. Anyways we kept running and we were incredibly afraid, I mean very afraid, and I had found a baseball bat and I felt that if I had this bat with me that I could hurt the parents, or the adults or whoever they were, and protect the two kids.
So we kept running away from them the whole night, and towards the end we ran into this large, empty room, and we were in the corner and I sort of turned invisible I guess, I don't know, but the mom had black hair and was very scary looking and she grabbed the twelve year old girl and when she did, she just stopped running, knowing that whatever happened next was inevitable. The fat man grabbed the boy as well, the man took the boy to a bed in the room and the woman took the girl to another bed in the same room, and told them to take their clothes off.
What was going on was so horrible and evil, and she just laid there, and the worst part was that it felt slightly good, because it was sex, and she was going through puberty, and she just laid there and kept taking it while the woman kept saying nasty things like that, and she just laid there, looking up at the ceiling, dead inside and confused because it felt a little good, and while that was happening the man in the other bed was raping the little boy. The man was fat and old and hairy and had his giant augmented penis inside the boy's asshole, and it was ripping and there was blood everywhere and the little boy was screaming, and I could feel it all as if it was me. This kept going on and on, and in the dream it was so real. Right now your reading this and you have no idea how it felt like, to be there and see this little girl and boy getting raped by adults, and it was so sick and twisted and evil, truely evil, and I was frozen, completely dead inside, just as the girl was.
Anyways in the dream I was terrified and I hated the both of them, so incredibly much, I hated them more than I have ever hated anybody or anything in my life. I looked for the bat that I had had but somehow their unimaginably dark minds made it dissapear. I can't even begin to describe how real it felt, how much hate I had for them. I don't know. I always thought "Everybody gets a chance to be saved", but in that dream I wanted them to burn in hell forever. And I felt like God would agree, that he wouldn't mind if I killed them right there and then.
I picked up the gun and shot the woman in the head, and her brain exploded into a thousand pieces and blood went everywhere, and some splattered on the bed and floor and the girl, and I felt so incredibly good, and then the man looked over and looked so terrified, more terrified then even the children, like the shot had brought his sick awareness to reality, like he had realized what he was, and as he looked at me it almost seemed as if a small part of him felt deserving, like he almost wanted to die. So I lifted the gun again, completely full of hate, and I shot that man in the head again and his head exploded all over the little boy and I felt like my body was on fire and having an orgasm because it felt so damn good to kill this fucking monster..., but somehow I knew that that wasn't nearly going to effect them as them raping them would.
Then the girl and boy ran to me and were crying and hugged me, and I told them everything was going to be okay, to put their clothes back on and we were going to go to a hospital or a psych ward or something, I don't know.
It just made me think about how people get raped and you hear about it in the news, or how there are gang fights and drug addicts and people molesting people, and whatever, and I realized that before it had always seemed so fake to me, like all this news that I hear all the time has really numbed me, like it all didnt' seem real, and that dream really woke me up, and I just thought about it a lot. I think that all these things we hear about sounds fake to us, somehow. I don't know.
It has been bothering me ever since, I really don't know how I feel about the death penalty anymore, I was so sure before, but when you see something like that or if your the victim, even though it was a dream, because it was real, at least temporary, I felt they deserved it.
It's like I don't know anymore, because what you do in dream I believe is what you would do in real life, and I would have shot those sick perverts, I really would have, in real life, I would kill them and hurt them and make sure they died.
I'm sorry for the language and description. What do you think? Do you think people should have the death penalty if they commit a great enough offence? Or does everybody truly have the chance to be saved? And is that feeling I felt, that compulsion to kill those perverts, is that just human? Or is it justice? Is there a difference, and what is the line?
:) Have a good day.